she smelled like sugar & spoke like the sea. ♥

my future?

2009-11-05T22:55:59Z

so today I was attempting to write my college essay. I got some crap down but.. it wasn't really how I wanted to put it all. I'm just afraid the college admissions people will read it and think I'm some type of idiot and deny me... last night I was really stressing college, I was questioning all of the decisions I made in high school, the major I've chose (Creative Writing) and more. but I realized, I really can do anything I want too. I don't have as many restrictions as I think holding me back. I've got the confidence and the drive. I can do this.

you, are, the only exception.

2009-11-05T03:25:53Z

it's nights like this, when we just lay down, holding each other, that make me feel like things are okay. I don't have to think about anything else. all I think about is how much I love you and how crazy I might be going from everything else going on in my life if you weren't there to tell me to calm down or relax or not to worry. you really are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I hope you don't go away. I need you.

newton's first law

2009-11-02T23:47:03Z

when something starts going, it doesn't want to stop. it's a matter of inertia, physics. so why would I ever want to stop feeling this way? I've already started.

wahh, whiney entry.

2009-11-02T23:39:36Z

college application proccess = HELLLLLLLLL.

party.

2009-10-31T18:12:22Z

last night I had my birthday party. first off all, I just want to say thanks to the people who came and thank you for the presents, but... (and yes, there is a but) I just feel like we spent too much money on a party that wasn't worth it. I guess it's my fault because I assumed some people were coming, who didn't. but, only about 2 or 3 people actually told me whether they could/could not come. and it's not my fault some people don't understand what RSVP means... honestly, it has nothing to do with the presents or who came, because I actually got a good amount of money and very thoughtful gifts. I'm just upset because I feel like my mom spent soo much money and time and worked so hard for a party that wasn't exactly worth it... and we don't have the money to waste on things like that. I don't think everyone realizes how much work actually goes into my parties, but they might, I just don't know it. I guess the only thing that really bothers me most is my mom spent so much on food and little touches and we're in a really rough spot right now. I wish I had stopped her from doing all of that, but there's no going back now, it's done and over with. I can't say whether or not I'll have much of a party next year, mainly because everyone's going off to college, who knows who I'll even be in touch with, but as of right now, I'm not planning on it. but I want the people to know who came, that I'm happy they did and for everything.

hm.

2009-10-30T00:32:38Z

I have such unnecessary trust issues. I guess it makes sense that I do, but I think it's dumb at the same time. either way, it just ends up making me look like the idiot. that's one of the worst feelings in the world for me, feeling like a fool.

she's got you high & you don't even know yet

2009-10-29T18:53:26Z

I am a super big pile of crazy mumbo jumbo innuendo? blickle blaggle gobble dee gook. basically, I'm just crazy. I don't know why I put the word innuendo in there, it shouldn't be there, but it was the first word that came to me after "jumbo." I carved pumpkins yesterday, it was fun. I'll post a picture of my pumpkin soon. I'm reading Through the Looking Glass & What Alice Found There. I finished Alice's Adventure's in Wonderland yesterday. now that I'm reading the books, I actually feel like a true fan. lately, I've been very consumed with my birthday party/halloween plans and my advanced photography class. applying for colleges is freaking me out. there's so much I am capable of doing with my life. it's all starting to blow my mind.

night time memories

2009-10-27T21:35:13Z

the air is much easier to breathe in at night.
memories are more sacred when made in the shadows.
the world turns a lot slower... when I close my eyes.

dissapointed.

2009-10-25T18:39:45Z

I set up all these wonderful plans for myself in my head and I never do anything about them.
and it's nobody else's fault but mine.

our mouth's are fleshing over, over, over, over.

2009-10-23T00:53:02Z

I've always loved Imogen Heap/Frou Frou, but lately I have this new found obsession with her. she's absolutely brilliant. someone get me a plane ticket to London.

21 october

2009-10-21T19:27:24Z

today is my birthday.

and I guess it just hurts to come in second when I was supposed to come first.

changes.

2009-10-20T21:41:50Z

tomorrow is my 17th birthday... when I think about what my life was like a year ago... I feel so different. I guess if you looked at it from an outside perspective, not much changed. people came and went, basically. but inside... I feel it. I am completely different.

:D

2009-10-17T19:35:15Z

only 4 days until my 17th birthday! :) I'm excited. my party is on October 30th, my house, it's a halloween theme, so people will be wearing their costumes. I'm excited about it, it will be nice to hang out with everybody for once. my mom and I bought kitty and puppy costumes, hahahha. kitty is going to be a clown and puppy is going to be a witch! oh and I don't know if I posted about this, but I got my costume a couple weeks ago. I'm going to be a sailor :) anyways! I'm happy and excited and I really want to watch it's the great pumpkin charlie brown right now!

ma mere

2009-10-14T00:40:16Z

I would be completely lost without my mother. I love her so much and she does so much for me. I don't think she'll ever realize how much she really means to me.

fuck yeah, we can live like this

2009-10-13T01:19:37Z

sometimes I just want to run away with you and live in a beach house somewhere along a southern coast, with windchimes, sand and sea glass in the windows, the colors blue, purple and green cover everything... I could walk the shoreline at night and wake up every morning to a flood of sunlight and your face.

<3 babe.

2009-10-11T19:25:32Z

miracle

2009-10-10T01:29:05Z

I still feel you sometimes... but I don't mind anymore. and that, itself, is a miracle.

mystify the magician

2009-10-08T21:11:56Z

seriously, the Everwold Series needs to be made into movies already. it's such a good series and so unappreciated. I own almost all of the books. I read them in 5th grade, I thought they'd have a movie out by now! someone needs to put this out there. everybody else gets their favorite series made into movies and stuff! I mean, honestly, I do love Twilight, but Everworld is SOOOO much better. if TWILIGHT gets to be a movie, EVERWOLD DESERVES to be a fricking movie. come on people. have some taste!

not a pretty girl

2009-10-03T17:40:37Z

I am not an angry girl, but it seems like I've got everyone fooled.

you are my anchor.

2009-10-01T03:51:58Z

tomorrow is our six month. technically, it's in nine minutes. I love you darlin'. <3

my love life has never been more wonderful.

teary eyed.

2009-09-30T01:36:23Z

sometimes I feel like I'm just stuck at a brick wall. nothing I say ever makes a difference. I should just stop talking.

I don't mean to wish my life away but...

2009-09-25T00:53:13Z

I really just wish september would end already. I am so ready for october!

haaalloweeen!

2009-09-22T20:41:21Z

I'm one of those weird people who thinks about what they're going to be for halloween as soon as january and I still haven't figured out what I want to be yet! I am rather impressed though with the spirit halloween store in the mall. there's a few costumes I like, I figured I'd post the pictures of them here. you're welcome to leave an opinion or suggestion or whatever! :)

Gypsy!

Forrest Nymph!

"Sexy Maurauder Wench" LAWL!

mark wants me to be robin so he can be batman haha

these are just some that I had in mind. I know they all look kind of skanky, but I do my best to make them as modest as possible hahaha

oh! and this is what I was last year,

Queen of Hearts :)

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

2009-09-19T23:07:50Z

WIZARDING WORLD OF HARRY POTTER OPENS IN UNIVERSAL STUDIOS ORLANDO IN SPRING 2010!!!!!!!!!
FLORDIA HERE I COME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

can't go back now

2009-09-18T00:27:11Z

you, you. and me, me. walk on, walk on, walk on.

<3